Ten things you discover when you are at home in the daytime

Whether you are working from home, retired, a house-spouse/at-home-parent, a night shift worker or just a sociology student, there are some things you discover that would remain unknown to you if your employment took you to another place to work every day.

Gas/electricity meter readers are required to wear sponge gloves at all times, for safety reasons. That is the sole explanation as to why you only hear the clank of the letter box and a card dropping to the floor saying that no one was in, but you didn’t hear the knock on the door that must have preceded it. It also appears highly likely that some delivery firms must only employ former meter readers.

The only people who ring using house landlines any more are automatons who are usually selling PPI recovery schemes. Either that, or we are soon to be subject to an invasion from robotic aliens who are gaining entry to the Earth’s atmosphere through telephone lines. But you find that less scary than the possibility that a human being may ring you on your home number.

The USA has not produced a good sitcom in at least a decade. Except for The Office, that is. But they got that from us.

Either breaktimes are getting longer or school pupils are not waiting until the lessons stop before sneaking out for a cigarette.

There’s not as much live sport on in the daytime as you’d think. Especially once the cricket season is over.

Bin men don’t come around as early as you assumed they did. Is it just me or, when you were a kid, did refuse collections always seem to take place at an inordinately early time? Not any more. Sometimes it can be quite disturbing when you’re having elevensies.

It’s not just in the rush hour that people drive like idiots.

Horror books are not as scary when read in daylight.

Whether it’s for Homes Under the Hammer or Friends, you should try not to plan too many of your ‘breaks’ around television programmes. If you plan your breaks around Jeremy Kyle, then, if we’re honest, the chances are that you don’t actually have anything to take a break from, do you?

If you are trying to get work done on a computer, Twitter and Facebook are the twin faces of evil. But at least you can spot how many people, whom you happen to know work in an office, actually spend most of their time updating the world on the status of their hangover.

Follow on Twitter: @Norbertsdad

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About Paul Speller

Writer, journalist, husband, dad.
Gallery | This entry was posted in Isle of Man, Parenthood and children, Sport, Television and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Ten things you discover when you are at home in the daytime

  1. What about Modern Family? Excellent American comedy (does it fit in to the sitcom category?)

    You are right about the binmen (and postman). They used to come round at the crack of dawn. Mine both turn up around lunchtime.

  2. Pingback: If you are an attractive woman, problem-solving is easier in your underwear – ten things the problem pages teach us | Paul Speller

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